An inconvenient answer

I always wonder what’s the price of me keep watching certain people?

Now may be I just got answer, an inconvenient answer.

The background is, there is part of me that would want to support those who are less fortunate than me. Like, for example I’m thinking about allocating some part of my profits in the future to support causes that I believe will bring greater good. In short, it’s like a philanthropic spirit.

I can’t quite explain where I got this tendency. But I read that be a service to other will make us fuller and happier. May be this is where it comes from. I’m not really sure.

I’m fully aware that when we help other we can’t always expect that they will appreciate our efforts. There is systematic reason why millions people are poor. In my opinion, there is also systematic way of thinking that makes people want to stay where they are. Not always bad, but not good at all when the situation is critical. For example, this way of thinking is good when people are already rich. It also prevents some people from being greedy and put so much damages in the world. But for people who lives in extreme poverty? This way of thinking is harmful for themselves.

In my opinion, no matter how people think, there should be bare minimum standard of living for example eat 2-3 times a day healthily, drink clean water, live with hygiene, receive good education, etc.

I was thinking how to grow my company bigger and bigger and work on this cause? Although perhaps I will start from the most relevant cause such as mental health. Not so sure for now. So it’s like capitalistic Robin Hood. Instead of robbing, I make a handsome profit and chanel it to people that are less fortunate.

But now I just realized, that there is already instrument for that. It is… Tax.

This is where I’m divided. My brain and my heart are not so in sync. Normally this is happen when I fall in love. But since now I’m so loyal like a dog to my family, it doesn’t happen any more. But, basically my brain and my heart are seldom to get along, now they found a new reason to spark a debate between them.

My brain is thinking about the wealthy people that pay less percentage of tax, or manipulate their financial report, then why shouldn’t I do that? Is it Halal or Haram, I don’t know. May be if I don’t lie too much, it’s still halal. Oh and those rampant corruption. I don’t know what percentage of it that goes to the officials’ personal pockets. The point is, tax is Cryptonite to my brain. So it want to pay as less as possible.

My heart has its own thinking. Contributing to the umbrella ☂️ that keeps the society safe and sound no matter what the weather, is philanthropic. After all, it gives meaning to life. Ultimately, I will get pahala.

So there here I go again, divided. I deserve gold for being divided so many times. But the gold won’t be given to me unless I earn it. So I’m chasing gold not for the sake of the gold itself, but because I’m divided.

But my heart is asking my brain to look for the angles to make it reasonable, no matter what other people doing. Cause I’m nearly the threshold of not eligible to use 0.5% rate anymore.